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    Tom和康奈尔大学

    • 文章来源:
    • 发布时间:2011年04月12日
    • 点击数:
    • 申请人Tom Zhou
    • 顾问Ray Zeng
    • 入学日期2009 年9月
    • 入读国家美国
    • 入读学历本科
    • 录取院校康奈尔大学(提前录取 )
    • 录取专业Engineering

    Standardized Test Scores/标准考试分数:

      SAT Ⅰ 总分 2140
      SAT Ⅱ 总分 2400
    分析讲解:

      SATⅠ考试考查的是“你有多聪明”,即人的阅读能力,逻辑推理能力,和表达能力。 对于这种考察潜力和智商的考试,美国招生官会把各部分的最高分相加得出一个最大值,表示该申请人的最高潜质。但是SAT相加总分的有效性,限于3次以下的考试次数。

    TOEFL (iBT) 托福 

      总分 104


    分析讲解:

      TOEFL / IELTS 考查的是国际学生的英文水平。是每一个国际学生必须达到的基本要求,而不能理解为:TOEFL 上线就应录取。请看Tom的具体案例分析:

    Awards & Honors, and Co-curricular Activities/主要奖项& 荣誉及课外活动

     

    School Activities
    Activity  Duration Position Experiences
    Class
    Student
    Government
     2006-2009   President  My many responsibilities included holding class meetings, organizing outdoor activities and acting as a bridge between students and teachers. During three years, I learned to better communicate and cooperate through this a tough but fun job.
     Grade Student Government   2006-2008   President  I organized events and competitions for the whole grade. One such event was a poetry contest. I worked from selecting the contestants to decorating the stage. We received high praise from teachers and students alike.
     Student Union   2006-2008   Member  In this big family, I was an active member. From making sure sports meets are safe and orderly to helping deaf and dumb children, I have done them all. Many times, the task was not easy, but working as a team helped me greatly.
    Advanced Class   2007-2008   Member For the top 5% of the grade, the academic rigor of this class helped me discover my weaknesses, pushed me to further progress, and motivated me through competition.
    Flag Raising   2006-2008   Member I was given the responsibility of raising the flag for the school on Monday mornings. It was truly an honor for me, and the drilling and training cultivated within me a pride for my school and for myself as well as perseverance.
     Chemistry Club   2006-2008   Member  It was somewhat challenging, but that made success at the end more satisfying. I did a great deal of independent study, but also learned chemistry from the other members. As a result, both my interest in and knowledge of chemistry was elevated.

     

    Extracurricular Activities
    Activity Duration Position Experiences
     Model UN Conference on Energy   Eight days  Delegate My topic was about biodiesel, which has advanced in leaps and bounds in its development. I raised questions about China’s current progress with biodiesel. I not only learned a great deal about biodiesel, but also how to gather that information.
     Chemistry Olympics at Sichuan University   One month   Team Member  I not only learned new things about chemistry, but also new ways of studying it: to look at a problem from different angles. Moreover, I learned of the many new materials not yet invented and many new elements not yet discovered. My interest in chemistry has tremendously increased.
     Charity Soccer Match   Once a year   Goal Keeper  In addition to being the goal keeper, I also helped with various other tasks. I look forward to the pleasure of volunteering at this event every year.
     China Yi Gong Organization   2006-2007    Volunteer  I fundraised for the organization and take care of the old. When we raised money to build a library for children who lived in a village located in the mountains, many people donated money, especially little children. I was moved to see how people are act in such a kind way.

     

    Awards & Honors
    Shu De High School Scholarship  Awarded to the top twenty students in our grade of 900 students at Shu De High School, top school in Sichuan Province
    Second Prize in Provincial Chemistry Olympic Competition  Over 10,000 students took part in the competition
    Commended Student Honor (successive two years) Awarded to model students for their hard work and outstanding academic performance.

     

    First Prize in English Olympics  Awarded to students for their English skills at the competition.

     

    分析讲解:

      Tom从校内活动,课外活动以及自己所获得的学术奖项来表现个人的兴趣和特点。从学校部分我们可以看出在学业方面,该生在实验班始终保持前五名的优异成绩,而且也积极参与校内的各种活动来体现出自己的领导能力,比如升旗手,班长,年级学生会主席以及校学生会成员。让招生官员看到了这个学生优秀不止一面。而同时,Tom也将眼光拓展于校外,甚至国外。例如他参加过模拟联合国,参与义工组织,体现其爱心和热心。当然最主要的还是他在学业方面所获得的成绩。该生一直都对化学和物理方面感兴趣,所以在我们的建议下积极参与各类的竞赛和相关的俱乐部,并且通过自己的努力取得了很好的成绩。一个十几岁的学生,努力,积极,有爱心,有热情,这样的品格就是进入名校学生必备的素质。这也是为什么Tom可以再提前录取中脱颖而出的前提条件。

    Cited paragraphs from Personal Statement /学生个人陈述节选

    Scene I
        “I have a dream that one day I can win over Jim.” I whispered to myself on my eighth birthday.(分析:没有人是完美的,每个人都会有迷失和嫉妒的时刻。小时候的Tom似乎也遇到了这样的烦恼,可是让招生官员好奇的是他如何走出困境呢?)
        Seeing my red eyes, father kept silent instead of common comforts.
        “Come on, boy. Let me take you to a dark and damp corner behind our apartment.”My father dragged me out of the warm quilt.
        “What do you see?”
        “I see snails, and they move so slowly .Hard as they try, they cannot move an inch for a long time”
        “Have you noticed that there is a snail high on that tree.”
        Surprised, I saw a snail, although burdened by its heavy snail shell, it made it all the way up to the tree.
        “Little by little, anything is possible.”
        Inspired, every defeat motivated me even more.
    (分析:每个人的启蒙老师都是自己的父母,Tom的父亲用一个很直观的方式教会了孩子一个道理。这种平淡的小事却可以反映出一个人今后发展的方向。)
     
    Scene Ⅱ
        Zhang Lin asked me:“What is a computer? Is it a book shelf filled with books?”
        “No. It is a machine”
        “Like a TV?”He continued.
        “Yeah, kind of but it is more powerful”
        That day I made a promise to myself: one day, I will buy him a computer.
    (分析:任何一个人看到这样的对话内心都会被震撼,可并不是每个人施予感动之后会施予帮助呢?一个优秀的学生不仅需要好的成绩,杰出的能力,最重要的是要有一颗爱心,而所有的名校都希望自己培养出的学生可以改变社会,拯救人类,而在接下来的故事场景中,Tom把自己的这份热忱发挥得淋漓尽致。)
     
    Scene Ⅲ
        “I have a dream that one day I could see my mother again.”I heard these words on TV from a little girl, creeping heavily after losing her mother in the earthquake.
        After one month, I, along with other five students went to an heavily earthquake-stricken area, Du Jiangyan at the foot of a mountain. Bricks were scattered everywhere, cracks remained in the still-standing building, and tents were put up here and there. Astonished, I saw about fifty kids learning Chinese.
        “This is our temporary classroom. The kids are eager to learn knowledge so we build this classroom as quickly as possible.”A teacher outside the “classroom” told me this.
        Standing outside it, I felt the power of knowledge and the power of our will to deliver that knowledge, even in the face of adversity.
     

    References/ 推荐信:

      关于老师的推荐信,班主任通过学术方面,集体活动,校外活动方面体现出该生的:

    1、可塑性;
    2、领导型;
    3.、社交性。
      以上各点在Tom的两位推荐老师的评价中有大量的文字体现,具体的事例穿插其中。比如:
        I can say what differentiates Mr. Zhou Zhehao from other excellent applicants is his compassionate, patriotic leadership. In him, the spirit of being a team and being a blessing people is vividly exemplified. And such a quality, I may say, will bring a somewhat different interpretation to the concept of leadership and of excellence. In my view, many people can achieve excellence in any field they attempt, but only a few of them can manage equal excellence for the entire team and pass on to other bodies.

    总评:
      在Tom的申请过程中,所有的文章书写、网申表格填入、申请资料投递、和考试中心英语成绩寄送,在华樱AIC团队的指导和启发下,全部由他自己本人和老师完成。而通过这样一个过程,Tom比以前更加成熟,更加坚定自己今后学业和事业的方向。不管自己身在哪里,都应该怀揣梦想,积极努力,大步前行。

    点击图片了解更多国家案例分析

       

    法国案例分析   

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    大家的评价

    • 澳洲学生Zhang RJ及家长

      备件顾问张老师非常的优秀,做事情很有条例,沟通也很好,尤其孩子的签证下得很晚,等待了很长一段时间,我们都非常着急,在这期间张老师很用心,比如张老师怕公司上班时间使馆的电话打不进去,所以早上很早就起来用自己的手机给使馆打长途电话,了解孩子的签证情况。我们都非常的感动,非常感谢张老师,华樱的服务确实非常好,以后我们会为华樱推荐更多的客户。

    • 华樱加拿大学子Zhou XY的爸爸

      “华樱三十年的品牌,一直坚持诚信、高效的优秀品质。我的大女儿五年前也是在华樱办的,目前在西蒙弗雷泽大学,是加拿大综合排名第一的学校。小女儿的签证之前在其它地方已经办过一次,但是拒签了。拒签后我们第一个想到来找华樱,刘老师的敬业、专业让我非常感动。因为我自己准备移民,很多财产都转移到了加拿大,所以办理的时候有一定难度,而且如果再被拒签就会很麻烦了,刘老师帮忙分析签证可能会遇到的问题,想了很多办法,比如说材料要如何准备才能更充分等。现在能顺利拿到签证非常感谢刘老师。当然也很感谢华樱,如果周围的人有这方面的需要我肯定会第一个推荐华樱,口碑的力量肯定是很重要的。如果华樱有需要案例,我非常愿意分享。”

    • 外语中心学子Tao YR的家长

      孙老师教得非常好,上课效果立竿见影,这学期孩子的写作考了班里第一名,上学期阅读好像也考了第一名,孩子非常喜欢她。另外,我觉得由客服部作为第三方来了解学生和家长的感受非常好,这样更能了解到我们的真实需求。

    • 意大利Cao Y同学

      “之前我有几个去意大利的同学签证被拒,邬老师为他们整理材料,挨个打电话,连续几晚都忙到10点多才下班。我知道她家里有小宝宝,却为我们牺牲了很多个人时间,真的让我非常感动!”

    • 美国学子Xiong DN妈妈

      华樱的原老师很好,表扬一下!我女儿就是在他的帮助下到美国的。现在美国大学成绩还不错!

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